“On his way back from the cathedral he brought me this graffiti flower, and that, the candle and the love brought extra luck.” Graffiti flower from Cologne inner city – photo by howlzap Cologne

I’m so incredibly grateful to my chief carer and partner. It’s so reassuring to have a hand to hold, an extra pair of ears to listen to the doctors and a shoulder to cry on. I appreciate having an insider; someone to chew all the details over with, someone who knows everything bladder cancer well enough to help make decisions with but also someone who stands up to me and presents another view when it’s needed.

I realize how lucky I am, especially as he can rearrange his schedule to come with me to all the appointments (Corona allowing).

I know it’s not the case for everyone. That not everyone has someone close to stand by and be there. Others cope alone or with a circle of friends or with a four -legged family.

I’d like to acknowledge that the job of carer to someone going through cancer or other life changing disease should never be underestimated. It is as emotionally tough and draining with the added stress of not always feeling they have an impact on healthy outcomes. Let me say now – you do have an impact in more ways than you know.

This post came to me the day before my recent check-up. Said carer was feeling tired but announced he was cycling into the city to light a candle in the cathedral for me. As he said, “You’re not particularly religious until you need it!”

Then it really hit me that it wasn’t just me feeling slightly sick and tunnel visioned about the cystoscopy the following day.

On his way back from the cathedral he brought me this graffiti flower, and that, the candle and the love brought extra luck. All was clear at the check-up the next day. We can breathe a long sigh of relief for another three months. Thank you to all the carers out there but especially to mine.